Rabid Monkey Fecal Matter

[Basil Elks]

Hey, if the women can have a thread, then this thread is for the men, where we can talk about manly like ponies, flowers, & shopping.

[Basil Elks]

Huh...., oops, I meant stuff like guns, farting, & sports. (Grrr, kill, kill, die) *weak laughter*

[Random]

I'd love to discuss talking with you about the finer art of bieng a man, but I can't type and scratch myself at the same time. Sorry.

[Basil Elks]

typing who said anything about typing? Let's talk about... huh...?stomping smurfs?

[SciFiGuy]

Ahh, guns, farting and sports. Here in Montana, you can do all three at once.
What a beautiful place to live... :rolleyes:

[Basil Elks]

the other day I was shopping at the Mall, & a pony came in with flowers in it's mane, it was so beautiful, it almost made me cry.
Oh wait, we're talking about manly things....huh....Go (insert local team). Yeah!!!
Once I farted while shooting a gun, in the middle of catching a stray football.

[Random]

a stray football? did it slip it;s leash and run wild or something? and hey man, some friendly advice, DON'T FEED IT! once you feed a stray, it'll hang around forever. Trust me, my that's how I ended up with my ex-wife.

[dmac7979]

Hey, if the women can have a thread, then this thread is for the men, where we can talk about manly like ponies, flowers, & shopping.

I think the men pretty much hijacked that thread.

And to get back on topic, while stomping smurfs (or should it be smurves?) I made a three pointer while farting.

[Random]

three point what?

[dmac7979]

A three point shot, there were smurfs all over the basketball court. It got real messy after 15 mins.

[Random]

OHHH Basketball. I thought we were gonna talk about SPORTS! but to each thier own I guess. j/k

[Badges2]

Hey! Anybody want to come over and play some baseketball in the driveway?

[Basil Elks]

Can we stomp on Smurf's, & fart, yet blame it on the dog, while reading nudie mags?

[Random]

Nudie mags! now there is a subject after every comic and gamer geeks heart!

[Badges2]

Originally posted by Basil Elks
Can we stomp on Smurf's, & fart, yet blame it on the dog, while reading nudie mags?
Don't you mean looking at nudie mags? Do they actually have reading material in them? I only look at the pictures. I never knew that they had words too.

[Basil Elks]

yeah, they have words, ...the name of the naked chick that you're looking at. :D heheheheheh

[kingpin20]

sadly i end up reading the articles more than stare at the beautiful...naked...drool

[Flinch]

What the? This is the manly thread, and no one has said a d@mn thing about drinking? You know, getting smashed, blasted, wasted, totaled, ininebriated, legless, toasted, blasted, sh*tfaced, drunk, gone, and in general reeeeeeally f**ked up.
Mmm, beer.

[Flinch]

I only stomp Snorks by the way. Stupid copyright infringing sons a.......

[Dore]

I once rode a pony while prancing carefree through a field of flowers....I...mean...I SHOT a pony with my GUN while FARTING on the flowers, thus KILLING them. Yeah, uhh...he..he..he..that's the ticket..sure...sure!

Let's go to the manly bar and drink manly drinks and do manly things with our manly bits, shall we? :)

[Random]

define "manly bits" could ya?

[Basil Elks]

*walks in with a muzzled rabid monkey, that's trained to throw its feces at whomever I point at.* Points at Beetle & Tick, then quickly looks away when they get hit.

[napa]

[proceeds to put hand in pants a la Al Bundyand cuts loose one loud enough to loosen your fillings.]

[gelf13]

<Singing>"Oooooo-Klahoma where the wind comes sweeping down...."

Oh, yeah manly things,

<<singing Heavy metal with devil horns and head banging>>" Yeah! Hot for teacher!!! I got my pencil....."


:D :D :D Gelf:D :D :D

[DS-00-0, FSD]

Originally posted by Flinch
I only stomp Snorks by the way. Stupid copyright infringing sons a.......

LMAO. Man, I remember those things. Green, underwater Smurfs!!

[freakazoid_x]

You people have a lot to learn about being manly... listen and learn.

I was out finishing up my shopping (I had to buy pants at the Mens warehouse for a funeral, I was in and out of the mall in 29 minutes) and I was waiting for the Max (Oregons answer to the Bart). Anyway I had remembered it was Fat Tuesday so, Garment bag in hand, I went to all the local bars and I must have seen 6 or 7 topless girls.

One gorl had eyes painted with body paint over the appropriate areas on her chest... and I was staring at it. She says "What are you staring at. So when I finally look at her face... well... Fugly was about what would best sum it up. Ruined the whole topless thing for me.

[Basil Elks]

Yes, it is allowed, we're allowed to stomp/bash everything in here, from the Smoggies to Oompa Loompa's. Now if you need me, I'll be in the washroom, watching Bay Watch.

[rabbidgerbal]

Makes you want to get some dried up room tempature beef jerky and watch some monster trucks... oh yeah ar ar ar.

No Lifetime channel for us, cause we're men! In fact just leave it on ESPN!

Well except when they have those great decorating shows with those wonderful room ideas and fabulous curtians... and that wonderfully animated guy who is just darling with print fabrics! Oh and those stamp and crafting shows... and cooking or decorating with Martha Stewart. ;)

AND Oprah! :eek: Oh how could we miss her and her wonderful shows... that last book in her book club, come on... we all cried didn't we?! :( It just reached in and touched the Rabbidgerbal. that Dr. Phil too, he's so inspiring!

Yes let us all light up cigar's and watch something suitiblly violent... like um... ultimate fight or Rambo. :cool:

:D

[Basil Elks]

Someone pull my finger, quickly, quickly.
"FRRAAAAAAPPPPP"
Oops, too, late.

[Noman]

Great Film.

AtB

Noman

[jedigeof]

Nothing is more manly than killing a half million Iraqis so we can fill up our gas gulping SUVs cheaper. Oh man total buzz kill sorry.

[napa]

Ever catch a fart and throw it on a buddy? it works, trust me.

[Basil Elks]

the best, ever.

[Basil Elks]

*Points at Dore* heh heh

[Noman]

I think this thread's in decline.

*Buys thread a drink*

There you go...

AtB

Noman

[Basil Elks]

*leaves "presents" in everyones shoes.* heh heh heh, good monkey.

[Basil Elks]

Bad monkey *spanks monkey* ;) . Ewww, he flung his feces at me!!!.

[Basil Elks]

point's at everyone, then runs & hides.

[Basil Elks]

Walks into room *sniff, sniff* WHOA!!!, why's it smell like my ##### in here?, Who's on clean-up duty? *check the list* Noman? NOMAN..., clean this room up NOW!!! :laugh: :grin: ;)

[Basil Elks]

HEY!!!, i forgot about this thread, lets start it up again! :grin: :grin:

[Billy Jack]

What do you think of a monkoptamus? It has the lower body of a hippopatmus and the upper body of a monkey? Wow according to spell check i spelled hippoatmus right.

[Basil Elks]

sounds great, does it fly?

[Billy Jack]

Originally posted by Basil Elks
sounds great, does it fly?
No but it eats them. And it also likes lox and bagels.

[Basil Elks]

Sweet! *fart*

[Charaxes]

Originally posted by napa
Ever catch a fart and throw it on a buddy? it works, trust me.

Oh yeah...funny stuff!

Personally, I like the Yokozuna.

[Basil Elks]

Originally posted by napa
Ever catch a fart and throw it on a buddy? it works, trust me. I just did that to CapA, in the "Cool Off" thread. :laugh:

[Basil Elks]

Ha-Ha, monkey Feces if funny.

[TheFreak]

no the ultimate manliness (and maybe even stupidity, but doesn't that go hand in hand) is lighting your farts on fire. i have done this, and almost burnt my butt!

But it was funny though!

[Basil Elks]

the just REEKS of hilarity! :laugh:

[TheFreak]

should have seen it...:devious: nuthin like burning farts. makes them NICE and stainky

[Basil Elks]

have you ever pissed out a fire?, wooee, now THAT reeks. :grin:

[TheFreak]

yes....yes i have..and when that didn't work, we threw dirt on it. and that my friend is REAL nasty. burning pee comin up through boiling mud....







yes it is as bad as it sounds

[Basil Elks]

Hmmm, we seem to have a real manly man amoungst us. *hands theFreak some beef jerky, & a cold stiff drink*

[TheFreak]

why thanks basil. as a matter of fact, i was at two "adult entertainment clubs" the other night.....man i hate utah clubs...you can't even buy a lap dance!

[Basil Elks]

can you rent one? *munching on some beef jerky* mmm

[TheFreak]

Nope, have to go to Wendover for anything REMOTELY decent. Which, if i'm lucky, i will in two weeks. turns out a chick i went to school with is a "dancer" now...





YAHTZEE

[Basil Elks]

That's always a bonus.

[TheFreak]

not to mention she's SMOKIN HOT

[Basil Elks]

yeah, I got to see all the hot chicks, that went to my school, naked. ( I had a pool, skinny dipping was allowed, when no-one else was home, ;) , Man those were great times.)

[TheFreak]

you are one lucky MOFO, that's the bottom line.

CAUSE THEFREAK SAID SO

I had a chance to see some seriously hot chicks skinny dippin, (and it was cold Yahtzee) but it would mean me (no problem) and my two buddies going first (wimps). Nope didn't happen. What a shame!

[Basil Elks]

yeah, the fun stopped, when my then girl friend, now wife, started to get jealous. Of course, later, she would ok it again, when she realize that she was bi, & wa also getting turned on by the hot chicks. Man now THOSE were/are some awesome videos!

[TheFreak]

my wife left me for a dyke she worked with....

[Basil Elks]

dude! :confused: :surprised

[TheFreak]

yeah, she was also into animals.....YIKES

[TheFreak]

ANYWAY! Back to dancers....gimme a beer

[TheFreak]

i saw this real hot chick in a cowgirl outfit, dancing to Cowboy....wahoo

[Basil Elks]

I went bowling last night (Woo Hoo, so manly!), it was a department staff party.

[TheFreak]

ah bowling. the one sport where you don't have to be in shape, hell the fatter you are the more you bring to the table! (Thanks Mr Foxworthy)

I can't bowl anymore. my elbow and finger are too thrashed.

Let that be a lesson kids, NEVER ride a bike and talk on a cell phone. Yes it is manly, and you may get a cool scar, but man it hurts like hell!

[Basil Elks]

then after that we went out for pizza, & some of us drank beer, not me though, I have to work later, plus I only like the hard stuff, & coolers. (yeah! Coolers, the manliest drink around! woop!, woop!)

[TheFreak]

Basil, i have to say, I love your sig

[Basil Elks]

thanx, I made it up myself. :laugh:

[TheFreak]

i think it deserves a nice, tall Jack and coke and a blonde

[Basil Elks]

here here, & cheers!

[TheFreak]

wait wait wait!

ziggy zoggy ziggy zoggy OY OY OY

ziggy zoggy ziggy zoggy OY OY OY

ziggy zoggy ziggy zoggy OY OY OY
And now! Girls jumping on trampolines!

[Basil Elks]

lol, ahh, the Man Show. :squareeye

[Charaxes]

The new man show sucks.
Jimmy and Adam were so much better.

[TheFreak]

i second. I want to kick Doug and that other dork square in the manly bits...

[Basil Elks]

Pizza, beef jerky, & alcohol for all the manly members.

[TheFreak]

thanks....but since only three of us are active on this thread, that's only three manly members here? oh well, bring out the dancers!

[Basil Elks]

so our clan has lessened, during it's hiatus, it'll pick up, again soon, I hope.:ermm:

[TheFreak]

as long as us Most Manly of all Men keep it up!



(snicker)

[Basil Elks]

lol, snicker is a laugh as well as a snack.

[TheFreak]

mmm...snicker cruncher....*drool

[Basil Elks]

*fart*
*burp*
*cups & waves both of them in your direction* ;) :p :confused:

[TheFreak]

ah man....that's murder most foul.


CHEERS!

[TheFreak]

i'll get you back after some Taco Bell..that'll peel the paint of the walls, and make you wanna slap yo momma

[Basil Elks]

Make some really spicy homemade chili for us men.

[Basil Elks]

Ahhh!!! Ow!!!, It's hot!, It's hot!, It burns, It burns. *downs 4 liters of milk* Ahhh! Much better. :classic:

[TheFreak]

wuss.....;)

[TheFreak]

ah hot....ok...i'll give you that one..

[Basil Elks]

Jalapenoes, & ground Cayenne pepper are my secret ingredients.

[TheFreak]

you need to try my granpa's salsa....the longer it stays in the open air, the hotter it gets. after an hour i've only seen two people that can handle it. my self and my uncle

[Basil Elks]

Goes in spicy hot, comes out spicy hot. :laugh:

[TheFreak]

i've seen it melt plastic yo

[Basil Elks]

Mine is melted plastic, yo! ;) :laugh:

[BDIDDY7]

chili its the best stuff on earht when cooked right

[Billy Jack]

I make my own peanut brittle want some :D
I agree chili is fantastic and awesome when it's cooked right
but when it's screwed it, it taste like evil. pure burning manical evil.

[Ramplate]

I put orange juice and raisins in my chilli when I make it:cool:

[Ramplate]

Originally posted by TheFreak
i'll get you back after some Taco Bell..that'll peel the paint of the walls, and make you wanna slap yo momma

Taco Bell is pretty wimpy food - their fire sauce isn't even hot enough - and what's with that "Beef"?:ermm: :confused:

Anything home made is MUCH better

[Billy Jack]

Wendy's best value menu ever, followed by taco bell and subway when i can afford it. Hey I have a question I had kfc last night and it tasted like crow. Whatever happened to quality control?

[Billy Jack]

Lol now i got a taste for a double stack with a side of chilli and cheese. It's only 7;30 here lunch is along way's off.

[Ramplate]

I also don't use beans or hamburg unless I'm in the mood for that kind of chilli - real chilli has real meat in it - no beans at all.
I take a marinated steak and slightly freeze it, so it's easier to slice thin. cut it into thin stripps and put that into my chilli. It's a Whole lot better than Bean and hamburg chilli.

[TheFreak]

Originally posted by Billy Jack
Wendy's best value menu ever, followed by taco bell and subway when i can afford it. Hey I have a question I had kfc last night and it tasted like crow. Whatever happened to quality control?

Kind of like when I went to McDonalds (first mistake) ordered an egg mcmuffin (second mistake) drove home without checking it (third mistake) and opened it up to see a face! And I mean two eyes and a beak starin at me...Do you know how sick that is???


And how do you know what crow tastes like? Didja have to eat your words recently? ;)

And as for Taco Bell sauce, I pretty much use it for flavoring and salsa shots! I maintain that my granpa has the best salsa!

[TheFreak]

Hey Basil, what do you think of my new sig?

[Basil Elks]

Originally posted by Billy Jack
I had kfc last night and it tasted like crow.
You know what crow tastes like?

[Basil Elks]

Originally posted by TheFreak
Hey Basil, what do you think of my new sig?

It's unique.

[Billy Jack]

Originally posted by TheFreak

And how do you know what crow tastes like? Didja have to eat your words recently? ;)


Lol i never had a non legal drug in me and like i was on the verge of haullcinating. Especially after my wierd dream i had when cheech and chong were teaching me how to play power bomb under t here new rules. That was one really foul piece of bird buzzard believe you me. :D

:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

[TheFreak]

I stole it from the Halo site my buddy found!

[TheFreak]

you know i still can't figure out those new rules....i mean, what's the deal with the Janet Reno figure? what makes her so special?

[Charaxes]

*burp*
*fart*
I was just re-reading this thread, and the manliness was too much to refrain from posting.

[Basil Elks]

Manly Men be we, burping & farting is all we do, for free.

[Charaxes]

Good to see ya, Basil. I thought you had left us.

[Basil Elks]

I just come & go. I'll occasionally write things, if I deem them worthy to be written about. Be happy, you've just been deemed worthy.

[Charaxes]

WHOO-YOO! I AM WORTHY!



Seriously, through, I take that as a huge compliment.

[Basil Elks]

You're worthy enough to be given controll of this thread, it's your's now.

[Charaxes]

Well, the only two people to post on this thread in the last two months are us...

[Basil Elks]

Good point. We're still on good terms, right?

[Charaxes]

Of course, my Canadian friend.

Quite frankly, I don't know what everyone's problem is with you.

[TheFreak]

hey, i remember this thread!! man it's been WAY too long. What 2-3 months since that last post i did? what greatness! And it's fitting, since I just got back from being a manly man myself!

[Basil Elks]

Revival of the man thread, commence.

[Charaxes]

FART!!!




BURP!!!!!!!!

[Basil Elks]

FERRRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPP!!!
:confused: :o :surprised I think I just ripped myself a new one!

[Puuka]

Why was this thread resurected?

[Charaxes]

Why not?

[Basil Elks]

It's the Man thread, aren't you manly enough for this thread?

[Joking Joker]

Oh god I just sprung a boner over Bill O'Riley.

Am I a man now?!?!?

[Basil Elks]

You sprung a boner, that still makes you a man.

[Joking Joker]

#####en!

[Basil Elks]

& you surf as well. You're totally a man. ;) :p

[BudPalmer]

Originally posted by Puuka
Why was this thread resurected?

I'm not sure but its good to know I'm not the only one who can't resist a good poop reference! LOL

[Basil Elks]

So..., are you gracing us with you presence for long, you're Grand Supreme Over Lordness?

[BudPalmer]

Depends you gonna keep giving me carp about my title that you are clearly jealous over? LOL

[Basil Elks]

Jealous?? I was just simply stating you're superiority over me.

[BudPalmer]

Jeeze I've gotten a lot a carp about that lately. I'm Gonna change it for everyone!

[Basil Elks]

Well..., now I don't have to bow down to you anymore. ;) Too bad, you would have been the only superior being that I would have listen to. :classic:

[FrankyTheClamp]

BACON ...

ooops wrong thread

[Basil Elks]

No, bacon is wanted here, too.

[Basil Elks]

Monkey's the best thing in this world, next to cheese.

[BudPalmer]

Oh you can still feel free to worship me Basil. I just wish people could understand that it was a joke.

[Basil Elks]

*Worships Bud, the Monkey God, from afar.*

[Basil Elks]

*Walks into this thread, scratches butt, heads towards the 'fridge, scratches crotch on the way there, arrives at the 'fridge, opens the door, grabs a six pack of beer, & seven microwavable burritoes, swaggers over to the microwave, nukes the burritoes, walks over to the living room, sits down inthe Lay-Z-Boy{sp?} chair, turns on the TV, flips it to "Nude Mudwrestling Playmates", leans back in the chair, eats three burritoes, farts, drinks 3 beers, burps, eats the other four burritoes, & drinks the other three beers, & watches the show.*

[Basil Elks]

I am a MONSTER amoungst GODS, therefore, I resurrect this thread once again. GO-O-O-O-O-O-OOOOO manly men!!!!, but watch out those icky, piss encrusted urinals. ;) :p :laugh: :disappoin

[Basil Elks]

Jerky & beer anyone?

[Charaxes]

Originally posted by Basil Elks
Jerky & beer anyone?

You forgot pudding...

[Basil Elks]

*opens the 'fridge door, revealing a life time supply of assorted puddings* Here, have at.

[Basil Elks]

*throws a horny, enraged, psycho monkey into the thread*
Go free my lovely child, go free!

[Noman]

ummmm...Basil, old friend, a bit TOO much of the old "manic booster opening in the small hours, where you realise that you are starting to get addicted to the smell of pre-packaged plastic figurines" methinks...

There is no Monkey - er - Spoon.

LoL

All the Best

Noman

[Basil Elks]

Th-the smell of burnt, rotting, plastic corpses must be getting to me. :( :devious:

[Noman]

Yup, I guess that would do it...

(phones Analyst, sugests Danger Money...)

LoL

All the Best

Noman