GMSLegion
05/05/2003, 18:46
Personally, I think that if they make any of these, I'm going to have an easier time convincing skeptics to play:
1. Before Captain America can act, the player must roll one die. On a six, Cap cannot act this turn because he is consumed with grief over Bucky’s death.
2. If E Captain America is on a team with R Hawkeye, the player must roll one die. On a six, neither piece can act on that turn, because the pair are too busy arguing who’s better qualified to lead this gang of yahoos.
3. If Harley Quinn and the Joker are on the same team, the player must roll one die each turn. On a six, Joker takes one click of damage because Harley has learned her puddin’ is steppin’ out on her and she’s clocked him with a big boxing glove.
4. R Shadowcat cannot taxi Wolverine anywhere, because she doesn’t trust him. He scares her.
5. If Booster Gold and Blue Beetle are on the same team, the JLA team ability is negated because they’ve turned the League into a laughing-stock.
6. Any veteran Ninja who rolls a critical miss does not take damage. Rather, his cover is blown, and the piece is removed from the board and replaced with a rookie Ninja. Real ninjas don’t critically miss because they have real ultimate power and totally flip out, man.
7. When playing the Key, the player must talk to himself, constantly.
8. When playing Dr. Doom, the player must refer to himself as DOOM, in capital letters, and not by any pronoun.
9. If the Thing is on one force and a Lackey, Henchman or Criminal on the other, then each player must roll two dice at the start of each turn. If either rolls a twelve, then the Thing may not perform any action other than chasing down the Lackey, whom he has recognized as a member of the Yancy Street Gang, and intends to clobber after that last exploding cigar gag.
10. Experienced Hulk does not share his Defenders team ability if the player rolls a six on one die, because Hulk decide he not do what Cape-Man tell him to anymore.
11. Should the Vision ever fail on an attack, any friendly figures adjacent to him must move one square away. They never trusted that android anyway and this just proved it.
12. Neither the Riddler nor the Joker (nor, later this summer, the Penguin) may use the Mastermind power on Lackeys or Criminals unless the player has given the "generics" proper, appropriate names such as Quip, Gag, Chuckles, Bozo, Pagliacci, Shark, Octopus, Piranha, Moray Eel, etc.
12a. Should either Batman or Robin fight either the Joker, Riddler or Penguin or any generic goons, then play must stop until an appropriate surface has been found to insert under the map in order to raise one corner of the playing field by ten degrees. Should the criminals be defeated, the map may be replaced at a normal, even level.
12b. The Mad Hatter figure doesn’t look a darned thing like the actor who played him on TV. Until Wizkids corrects this mammoth error, he cannot be used in sanctioned play.
13. If you are fielding Black Widow and your opponent fields a Nick Fury, then unfortunately you must remove Black Widow from play. Fury has used her as a double agent to infiltrate communist China. If you have any Avengers on your team, they must leave the game after twenty minutes to go rescue her.
14. Should Wizkids introduce a Titanium Man figure, and should a player elect to play him on the same team as Magneto, then the Crimson Dynamo has to come along for the ride.
15. The Masters of Evil team ability is hereby negated. Because there’s no effing Baron Zemo figure. How can you have a effing Masters of Evil without effing Baron Zemo?! That just doesn’t make sense, man!
1. Before Captain America can act, the player must roll one die. On a six, Cap cannot act this turn because he is consumed with grief over Bucky’s death.
2. If E Captain America is on a team with R Hawkeye, the player must roll one die. On a six, neither piece can act on that turn, because the pair are too busy arguing who’s better qualified to lead this gang of yahoos.
3. If Harley Quinn and the Joker are on the same team, the player must roll one die each turn. On a six, Joker takes one click of damage because Harley has learned her puddin’ is steppin’ out on her and she’s clocked him with a big boxing glove.
4. R Shadowcat cannot taxi Wolverine anywhere, because she doesn’t trust him. He scares her.
5. If Booster Gold and Blue Beetle are on the same team, the JLA team ability is negated because they’ve turned the League into a laughing-stock.
6. Any veteran Ninja who rolls a critical miss does not take damage. Rather, his cover is blown, and the piece is removed from the board and replaced with a rookie Ninja. Real ninjas don’t critically miss because they have real ultimate power and totally flip out, man.
7. When playing the Key, the player must talk to himself, constantly.
8. When playing Dr. Doom, the player must refer to himself as DOOM, in capital letters, and not by any pronoun.
9. If the Thing is on one force and a Lackey, Henchman or Criminal on the other, then each player must roll two dice at the start of each turn. If either rolls a twelve, then the Thing may not perform any action other than chasing down the Lackey, whom he has recognized as a member of the Yancy Street Gang, and intends to clobber after that last exploding cigar gag.
10. Experienced Hulk does not share his Defenders team ability if the player rolls a six on one die, because Hulk decide he not do what Cape-Man tell him to anymore.
11. Should the Vision ever fail on an attack, any friendly figures adjacent to him must move one square away. They never trusted that android anyway and this just proved it.
12. Neither the Riddler nor the Joker (nor, later this summer, the Penguin) may use the Mastermind power on Lackeys or Criminals unless the player has given the "generics" proper, appropriate names such as Quip, Gag, Chuckles, Bozo, Pagliacci, Shark, Octopus, Piranha, Moray Eel, etc.
12a. Should either Batman or Robin fight either the Joker, Riddler or Penguin or any generic goons, then play must stop until an appropriate surface has been found to insert under the map in order to raise one corner of the playing field by ten degrees. Should the criminals be defeated, the map may be replaced at a normal, even level.
12b. The Mad Hatter figure doesn’t look a darned thing like the actor who played him on TV. Until Wizkids corrects this mammoth error, he cannot be used in sanctioned play.
13. If you are fielding Black Widow and your opponent fields a Nick Fury, then unfortunately you must remove Black Widow from play. Fury has used her as a double agent to infiltrate communist China. If you have any Avengers on your team, they must leave the game after twenty minutes to go rescue her.
14. Should Wizkids introduce a Titanium Man figure, and should a player elect to play him on the same team as Magneto, then the Crimson Dynamo has to come along for the ride.
15. The Masters of Evil team ability is hereby negated. Because there’s no effing Baron Zemo figure. How can you have a effing Masters of Evil without effing Baron Zemo?! That just doesn’t make sense, man!