View Full Version : Favorite Pirate Joke....
rabidroadkill
03/19/2004, 11:12
In honor of Wizkids newest attempt at gaming, I give you to you, my favorite pirate joke ever. I can't tell it without cracking up (you have to talk like a pirate to get it) :)
A Pirate walks into a bar.
Bartender says, "Excuse me, but do you know you have a steering wheel hanging out of your pants?"
The Pirate says, "ARRRRGGGHHH, its driving me nuts!"
:laugh: I'm laughing just thinking about it :laugh:
A pirate walks ito a bar with one eye missing, one leg missing, and a hook instead of his right hand..
Barman:- Wow! A real Pirate!
Pirate:- Indead I am sir!
Barman:- Fantastic, I've never met a real Pirate before! Can I ask, how did you loose your leg??
Pirate:- One day at sea there was a huge storm! & I was washed over board.... As my crew mates dragged me back on board, a shark swam up and bit my leg clean of!
Barman:- Wow! What a story! & how did you loose your hand!
Pirate:- I was battlin on the Spanish main! Tryin to raid a merchant ship, when a swordsman jumped out and cut my hand clean of! My crew mates killed the swordsman, & I now have a hook for a hand!
Barman:- WOW! These stories just keep getting better! How did you loose your eye!
Pirate:- I was looking up to the crows nest one day, and a seagull pooped into my eye...
Barman:- ????? But that wouldn't make you loose your eye???
Pirate:- That be true, but it were my first day with a hook for a hand! :) :grin: :laugh:
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 11:35
Arrrrr!!! I dub you honorary pirates! Now join the Pirate Clan!
seandalrymple
03/19/2004, 11:43
I went into the grocery store the other day, and I saw a display of pirate corn. That stuff is expensive! It's a buck an ear!
Please don't hurt me!
webhead817
03/19/2004, 11:49
RRK, that was hilarious. Kudos to you sir!
space_cowboy
03/19/2004, 11:50
The only pirate jokes I know would get me banned from the site.
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 11:53
What do you call 1000 so-called "ninjas" as the bottom of the sea?
A good start!
Wait, this is for jokes ABOUT pirates, not jokes FUNNY TO pirates . . . :grin:
oseefus1
03/19/2004, 11:57
This is the only one I no and I saw it o Spongebob.
Why couldn't the 10 year old get into the pirate movie?
It was rated RRRRRRRRR
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 11:59
Arrrrr! I likes that one oseefus1! Come join the Pirate Clan!
Eric Rage
03/19/2004, 11:59
Originally posted by rabidroadkill
A Pirate walks into a bar.
Bartender says, "Excuse me, but do you know you have a steering wheel hanging out of your pants?"
The Pirate says, "ARRRRGGGHHH, its driving me nuts!"
Disciplev1 told me this freakin' joke over a year ago, and I still haven't forgiven him for it. Among my friends, this is the Joke That Shall Not Be Named.
rabidroadkill
03/19/2004, 11:59
Ouch Sean ;)
oseefus1
03/19/2004, 12:03
reely gentlegamer
shin-goji
03/19/2004, 12:05
Oroko Saki the ninja was very distraught. His sister Kari, had to be put away in an asylum becuase she was conviced she had the same powers as Medusa of the inhumans.
So the ninja had to commit harry kari.
Thank you, I'l be here all the week.
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 12:05
oseefus1: Arrr! Come aboard matey!
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 12:06
Originally posted by shin-goji
Oroko Saki the ninja was very distraught. His sister Kari, had to be put away in an asylum becuase she was conviced she had the same powers as Medusa of the inhumans.
So the ninja had to commit harry kari.
Thank you, I'l be here all the week.
. . .
oseefus1
03/19/2004, 12:07
hoo started the pirate clan?
shin-goji
03/19/2004, 12:08
Originally posted by oseefus1
hoo started the pirate clan?
A disgruntled ninja.
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 12:11
Originally posted by oseefus1
hoo started the pirate clan?
Ignore the purple people eater!
Sail on over to the Pirate Thread!
Honest true story:
My friends and I do up Halloween every year. So this one year a friend who lost his leg from below the knee goes as a peg leg pirate. He rented an elaborate costume from a shop and modified a prosthetic to be a peg leg.
At the big party we went to, people were going up to him all night saying "that's a great costume dude, but where'd you hide your leg!?"
CaptainMarvel
03/19/2004, 12:24
Pirates don't need to tell jokes.....they are jokes.
Pirates are fools and this game along with this thread will soon be forgotten.
:p
shin-goji
03/19/2004, 12:35
There was a secret area where mystical assassins would gather to talk about upholstery, discuss collecting teacups, and see who was the better dancer.
The name of this place?
Ninja Gay Den [say it out loud, video game addicts will get it].
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 12:38
Originally posted by shin-goji
There was a secret area where mystical assassins would gather to talk about upholstery, discuss collecting teacups, and see who was the better dancer.
The name of this place?
Ninja Gay Den [say it out loud, video game addicts will get it].
AKA: the totally sweet NINJA thread . . .
seandalrymple
03/19/2004, 14:18
Best pirate song ever.
http://www.relaxism.com/artofrx.html
rabidroadkill
03/19/2004, 14:28
Originally posted by shin-goji
There was a secret area where mystical assassins would gather to talk about upholstery, discuss collecting teacups, and see who was the better dancer.
The name of this place?
Ninja Gay Den [say it out loud, video game addicts will get it].
Hmmm, and here all these years I have pronounced it
Ninja GUY-DAN ;)
Lightshear
03/19/2004, 18:25
Alright, this one is carp, but it's the only Pirate joke I know...
Why are Pirates so funny?
They just Arrrrrrrrr!
:noid:I'm sorry. I'll go, now.
Originally posted by oseefus1
Why couldn't the 10 year old get into the pirate movie?
It was rated RRRRRRRRR
and you wanna know why? because of all the booty!
What Star Wars character is really a pirate? AARRRRGGH-2 D-2!
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 20:00
Arrrr, mateys! These be great jokes! Lightshear and Poring: sail on over and join the Pirate Clan! Ye would make fine buccaneers!
What has 8 arms and 8 legs? Eight pirates!AAAAAAARRRRRGGHHH
Have you heard about the new pirate movie? It’s rated AARRRRGGH! And do you know why? Because of all the booty! AAAAARRRRRGGGHHH
What’s a pirate’s favorite country? AARRRRGGHentina!
What’s a pirate’s second favorite mode of transportation? A cAARRRRGGH!
How much does it cost a pirate to get a piercing? A buck an ear!
How did the pirate stop smoking? He used the patch! AAARRRGGGHHHH
AAAAARRRGGGGHH maities! AAAARRRRGGGHHH
Keep the thread going AAAARRRRGGGGHHH!
What has 8 arms and 8 legs? Eight pirates!AAAAAAARRRRRGGHHH
Have you heard about the new pirate movie? It’s rated AARRRRGGH! And do you know why? Because of all the booty! AAAAARRRRRGGGHHH
What’s a pirate’s favorite country? AARRRRGGHentina!
What’s a pirate’s second favorite mode of transportation? A cAARRRRGGH!
How much does it cost a pirate to get a piercing? A buck an ear!
How did the pirate stop smoking? He used the patch! AAARRRGGGHHHH
AAAAARRRGGGGHH maities! AAAARRRRGGGHHH
Keep the thread going AAAARRRRGGGGHHH!
What has 8 arms and 8 legs? Eight pirates!AAAAAAARRRRRGGHHH
Have you heard about the new pirate movie? It’s rated AARRRRGGH! And do you know why? Because of all the booty! AAAAARRRRRGGGHHH
What’s a pirate’s favorite country? AARRRRGGHentina!
What’s a pirate’s second favorite mode of transportation? A cAARRRRGGH!
How much does it cost a pirate to get a piercing? A buck an ear!
How did the pirate stop smoking? He used the patch! AAARRRGGGHHHH
AAAAARRRGGGGHH maities! AAAARRRRGGGHHH
Keep the thread going AAAARRRRGGGGHHH!
What has 8 arms and 8 legs? Eight pirates!AAAAAAARRRRRGGHHH
Have you heard about the new pirate movie? It’s rated AARRRRGGH! And do you know why? Because of all the booty! AAAAARRRRRGGGHHH
What’s a pirate’s favorite country? AARRRRGGHentina!
What’s a pirate’s second favorite mode of transportation? A cAARRRRGGH!
How much does it cost a pirate to get a piercing? A buck an ear!
How did the pirate stop smoking? He used the patch! AAARRRGGGHHHH
AAAAARRRGGGGHH maities! AAAARRRRGGGHHH
Keep the thread going AAAARRRRGGGGHHH!
What has 8 arms and 8 legs? Eight pirates!AAAAAAARRRRRGGHHH
Have you heard about the new pirate movie? It’s rated AARRRRGGH! And do you know why? Because of all the booty! AAAAARRRRRGGGHHH
What’s a pirate’s favorite country? AARRRRGGHentina!
What’s a pirate’s second favorite mode of transportation? A cAARRRRGGH!
How much does it cost a pirate to get a piercing? A buck an ear!
How did the pirate stop smoking? He used the patch! AAARRRGGGHHHH
AAAAARRRGGGGHH maities! AAAARRRRGGGHHH
Keep the thread going AAAARRRRGGGGHHH!
OOOOPS AAARRRRGGGGHHHH.........ignore all the other posts I have except for one...my computer started freezing and kept thinkin I hit enter when I didnt...ooops
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 21:28
joshua: Sail on over to the pirate thread and join us in pillaging! Arrrrr!
AAARRRGGHHHH wheremight I find this pirate thread? AARRRGGGHH
Gentlegamer
03/19/2004, 22:04
It be here in Another Realm, matey! Arrrrr!
Rokk_Krinn
03/21/2004, 20:28
It's not as good as some of the jokes on here, but the first Pirate joke I ever heard...
What's a pirate's favourite letter of the alphabet?
Ahrrrr!
:rolleyes:
fearman111
03/22/2004, 11:25
A pirate ship is bearing down on a freighter. The pirate captain says to the cabin boy "Fetch me my red shirt!"
The freighter is boarded and looted. Later, the cabin boy says "Captain, why do you always wear the red shirt when we encounter another ship?"
"This be the reason, matey," the Captain says. "Should I be wounded, the enemy won't know about my weakness, and my crew won't worry about my safety."
The cabin boy thought that was a pretty good reason. Next thing you know, Spanish warships are bearing down on the pirate ship from all sides
The pirate captain says to the cabin boy "Fetch me my brown pants."
fm
Lex Luthor Jr
03/22/2004, 14:01
One of my favorite comic strips ever...
Man - "Top of the morning to ya!"
Woman - "Oh, yeah. It's St. Patrick's Day. The day we are treated to your bad Irish accent."
Man - "Shiver me timbers!"
Woman - "...That's a pirate."
Caption - "On St. Patrick's Day, everyone is Irish. ...Some a little more than others."
How did the pirate get a free room at the University of British Columbia?
He was an arrrrrrrgh eh!
That movie is rated Arrrrrr!
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