Granted.

*Dies before he can reveal how the wish could be granted*

*turns out he was going to be one of the friends*

I wish I could sing.

Granted

You can sing...like Britney Spears. You're teenie pop singing repulses Pashy so much he divorces you, and in grief, you kill yourself.

I wish I didn't have midterms.

Granted.

But you have finals in the place of midterms, and you haven't finished the course yet.

sigh.....i love reviving old threads....

I wish I was a clix figure of my own.

Granted you are now 2 inches high and a favorite playthings for dogs

I wish Tuttle would just break down and give us complete spoilers for Crisis and Nightmares to us all

Granted

But you got Mordru instead of anyone really relevant

I wish i understood this thread before i broke it

Granted.

You do.

But since I don't understand what breaking a thread means, I kill you. But first I cut your fingers and toes off.



I wish I could play the harmonica with great ease.

Granted.

But now, your jaw breaks due to your over-playing.

I wish my wishes could never be corrupted...

Granted.

But others' can. So let's keep playing .

I wish I was Tim The Tool Man Taylor.

Granted but the law of averages had to catch up to you eventually. A super charged buzzsaw jumped off a table slicing off both legs and your Little Timmy's.
I wish I Bruce Campbell would get the respect he deserves

You do, but while filming Evil Dead III the chain on your Chainsaw breaks and you are slashed accross the face, making you a permanent cartoon character voice star.


I wish to have Super Strength!!!

Granted, but your Super Strength is so powerful, you crush children and senior citizens to death when you try to hug them. Also, it is impossible for you to now make a peanut-butter and jelly sandwich, as whenever you do, it becomes one big ball of mush in your super-strong ham-sized fists!


Oh, I wish for a sequel to the great Tom Cruise & Penelope Cruz movie, Vanilla Sky!

Granted.

It was called Chocolate Sea and it grossed $50 million in the first weekend because of Tom Cruise, and then flopped, because of Tom Cruise. Two months later, it comes out on DVD with the deleted Penelope Cruz half-way porno scene which was the only reason to rent it to begin with. You're girlfriend finds it in your DVD player and absent-mindedly throws it behind her, sticking in your head and making you go to the emergancy room. Plus you owe $21.99 to replace the broken DVD to the video store.

I wish I could've dated Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.